Being a Mom is the hardest job, you never know if you are doing it 100% and you question lots of “Mom Life” moments.
When you have a child with special needs those moments are magnified and every aspect of life seems to throw itself at you in ways you never knew could exist. Life itself has changed forever and you will wish you could live forever to make sure your child is always cared for the way you do.
But you also need to care for yourself and have you time. If you do not have “me” time you won’t survive this journey… so brace yourself and understand that it is ok to step away and allow someone who is trustworthy to care for your little one while you find ways to not go insane.
Over the last 4 years I have learned more than I could ever imagine and I’m still in the beginning of this journey but I have picked up some items and must haves along the way that I want to share with you…
Mom Life Must Haves
For Your Everyday Life
- First item is to always have an easy little black purse that you can trade in your big Mom purse for when you need to go somewhere without your little tribe following. This allows you less weight on your shoulders and bingo you don’t have to dig through snacks and toys or even medical supplies to get to your stuff. Keep it simple, black goes with everything.
- The next thing is kind of a touchy subject for some… make sure that you are able to keep up with fashion. No do not go buy GUCCI products and look through Vogue for ideas, just keep it simple again. Skinny jeans and a blouse with some booties. But do not go to lunch with your friends looking like you were doing laundry in your home or with spit up stuck to you. Trust me, make sure you look good it will make you feel good. I always have one of those curling wands and when my hair looks awful I use it for a few curls and bingo easy waves and done…
- If you are like me myself and I you may need extra help in the department of makeup and especially under eye coverage. I’m a special needs mom hello people I run on coffee fumes and stay up late to binge watch Netflix so I can have no restrictions on what I am watching and no one is awake so I have no obligations at that time. That all being said I have dark friends under my eyes that don’t help me so I use It Cosmetics : Bye Bye Under eye cream and it is a miracle worker!
- Always have wine on hand. My go-to is usually wine or cider and what I mean by always have it on hand is you never know when you will need to grab a bottle and sit down with a friend or even yourself in your room when you need a moment. No I am not promoting taking up drinking as a hobby at all, please do not do this.
- Have friends who are there for you and support you no matter what. You will learn a lot about your friends once you become a special needs mom and that will hurt too. You will lose some and gain some and you will also get too busy to be involved in the lives of the ones you held so dear. Having friends is so important though and we have all kinds of friends you will need those who understand of course and you will also need those who are always down for fun and the ones who can be there in a jam if you text them and say “Hey dinner tonight I have a sitter?” you need them all so don’t shut yourself out.
- The next thing I suggest always having is a plan… yeah a simple plan for whatever it is that you are going to do. Meaning you are going to lunch at 12 with your friend and your husband or your baby sitter is going to be home. You let them know you will be gone a few hours and leave them with a notebook on “how to” for your child with #’s in case of emergencies. You check in, but you also have made a plan for them and set them up with tools to help your child while you are out and this will make you relax while you are away. I even go as far as prepping food for my daughter and laying out her clothes in case she has an accident.
- If you are married or have a partner you need to remember that they also need me time. You have to play fair in that department if you want to have a great connection and establish that you both care about your sanity. Yes you can feel as if you are going crazy if you don’t get out and do things.
This world is crazy and we all feel the stress within our life. Make sure not to add to the crazy and have those moments you deserve.